Will he come back? When and will he be alone? Is hegone? You try to relax and hear something, anything in the room. You can?t heara movement; nothing that would signify another man?s presence. Not even a scentbut on the other hand the room is full with the smoke from your clothes fromthe bar so you couldn?t smell anything even if you tried. All of a sudden you hear a light?click? and your head jerks backwards as much as possible. A few agonizingseconds follow and then you hear the intro of ?Strange day? (6). Thecreak of a chair and light steps following that and you try to understand theirlocation. You scream but nothing comes out. You try to get whatever is thething that keeps you blind off but you fail. The footsteps come near you.You?re panicking again. There is a pressure applied on the bed. He sat besideyou and you?re yelling behind the gag. You feel a hand pushing your hair aside.You jerk yourhead left and right to avoid his touch. Thebed is shaking violently from the movement. I saw the truth in her beautiful green eyes, her sweet face framed by perfect, almost black short hair that shone in the late evening sun. ‘I was going to say that I wondered if me getting married would change things between us. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.’ How could she be sorry for doing nothing? I sobbed again, one of those sobs that rack you like a child’s sobs do. My head fell forward and tears fell onto the pale blue of my dress. Why does water show so clearly on pale blue? I half pulled myself together and took another cigarette from Tippi’s pack and lit it. I waited for her to tell me off for smoking – I only stopped because she’d told me to, had begged me to. She didn’t. Instead she sat beside me and looked out over the view but I knew she wasn’t seeing it any more than I was. Her voice was low and calm. ‘Of course I knew. If I had ever, ever had a woman lover it would have been you. I even thought about it, like you think about things that you know you simply.
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